On The Night Before He Died

I’m sitting here, watching them.
They are laughing and sharing this meal with me.
I can see it in their movements, in their eyes, in their laughter.
They have no idea what this night brings with it.
I know I have to tell them.
But how do I?
How can I?

We’ve grown so close.
They have become a part of me.
I love them so much that I can’t bear it.
How do I tell them that tonight is the beginning of the end?
How do I tell them so that they will understand?
How do I tell them so that they don’t desert the plan?
How do I?

I look into their smiling eyes
And I am lost in my sadness.
I can’t hear their chatter and bickering
Without choking down my tears.
These are my friends; they are my brothers.
Who will take care of them when I am gone?
How can I leave them?
How can I?

Will they even remember me once I'm gone?
Or will I simply disappear from their memory?
I don’t want to leave them.
I want to stay with them.
Don’t make me abandon them.
Don’t make me!

I can’t help but worry about them.
They followed me to this place.
They trusted me like I trusted you.
There is so much they don’t understand.
There is so much more I need to teach them.
They aren’t ready to go it alone.
I’m not ready to let them go.
I can't let go.

Why must it be tonight?
Why can’t I have one more year?
I can do so much more with another year.
I can touch so many more people in that year.
They can become so much stronger in that year.
I’m sure I’ll be ready to let them go then
If you gave me just one more year.

The world was not ready for me now.
If it was, I wouldn't have been turned away.
No one understood the message.
No one believed enough in the message.
If I had one more year, I could have made them see.
Just one more year....

But I know it’s too late to turn back now.
I must finish what was started.
The night must fall
For the New Day to begin.
I’m not ready to let go
But I must.
I must.